What a Hewdge surprise! All this time, Michael Jackson had a secret sister named JohVonnie, who, according to the news media, was an ‘outcast’ and rejected by the Jackson clan. Read the full story here:

Madame Gris-Gris, Haitian Celebrity and ‘Medium to the Stars’, sits down for a rare in-depth interview with Hewdge’s editor GG Qlarq, to talk about Michael Jackson’s moving communication from beyond the grave.

GG: Madame Gris-Gris, thank you for this interview

MGG: pas de tout, cher Gi-Gi, it is I who zank you!

GG: …yes, well, moving on…

Madame Gris-Gris, you claim that during your most recent trances, Michael Jackson has been communicating with you from the spirit world…What have you learned?

MGG: Michel  ‘as told me many zings…many zings…

GG: for example…?

MGG: ….oui, oui, truly incredeeble zings!…By ze way, ‘ave you read my new book,  ‘Chicken Blood for ze Soul’?

GG: No. Tell me about Michael’s secret sister. How does he feel about her?

MGG: cher GiGi,  Michel is ‘aving ze good amusement in ze spirit world…

GG: …and this is because….?

MGG: crazee, bitchee people are zaying zat Michel is really alive and pretending to be JohVonnie – ‘EES OWN SISTER!  Ha!

GG: I’m listening….

MGG: but zat ees une idee ridicule, n’est-ce pas? Vraiment, can you imagine for one second – Michel Jackson in ze drag, pretending to be a woman?!

GG: um….wonderful to talk to you Madame….

Sir Elton John, short, flamboyant superstar and devoted husband to Canadian film maker David Furnish, is disappointed that his initial bid to adopt a Ukrainian infant has been rejected. Click here to read the full story:

Dear Elton
Regarding your attempt to adopt a Ukrainian infant, I have to agree with the minister for Family, Youth and Sports, Mr Yuriy Pavlenko, who thinks you’re too old and too gay.
Elton, have you thought about how that poor little Ukrainian infant will turn out, with you and your ‘same-sex partner’, mincing round that huge mansion, being fed Advil every time a tooth comes through? Pain-killers are of course, DISGUSTING! We Scientologists have to ask: How can you and your gay lover be positive role models to that innocent child, if you insist on giving him over-the-counter medication?

Yours,
Tom Cruise

Mon Cher Elton
During my last séance with Michael, he instructed me to contact you toute suite. ’Call my little fag friend Elton,’ he wailed, ‘and tell him if he really wants a child, to get  together with Debbie Rowe…she is free at last, free at last!’
Strange, haunting words, Elton, but who are we to understand those who have passed on to the spirit world?
By the way, I take private bookings and will be in the UK from September to November.

A Bientot,
Madame Gris-gris

Dear Sir Elton
We’ve never met, but I have been a fan of yours since I was little. Now I have kids of my own – 14 in fact, and I’m looking for a good home for some of the latest batch. I think you and your partner David would make ideal parents. Can you take 5 or 6? This would help pay for liposuction on my upper thighs

Hoping to hear from you,
Octomom

PS: I only use one name for those kids, because they all look alike

Jean Haner, of San Diego, California, is a expert in Chinese face reading, a branch of Chinese medicine. She believes that our face is a reflection of our unique inner blueprint. In this article, posted on her website: www.wisdomofyourface.com, she delves into the face and fate of Michael Jackson.

“We’re all so sad and distressed to lose Michael Jackson, and to look back at his life and how things unfolded so painfully for him despite his brilliance and success.

I’ve often used Michael Jackson as an example in my courses of how such drastic changes to someone’s face can indicate – and worsen – severe personal problems. But it was chilling to hear about the timing and probable cause of his death because it’s so in alignment with what Chinese face reading would say about him.

He was said to have had dozens of plastic surgeries on his face and these really changed his entire ‘destiny’ – especially transforming the decade of his 40’s from one that would have been powerful, grounded and filled with successful relationships to one of devastation. One of the things the nose represents is what your life experience will be in your 40’s, and this is the period that turned out to be such a nightmare for him.

I was especially worried about him at this specific time in his life because age 49-50 is represented on the face as the area from the tip of the nose down into the philtrum (the groove above the upper lip). Because the tip of his nose was so disfigured, this would indicate a time of dangerous transition.

In addition, the tip of the nose is said to reflect the health of the heart. The features and markings on someone’s face are just a mirror of who they are inside, both physically and emotionally. So, while as I’m writing this, the final cause of death has not yet been determined, it wouldn’t be a surprise to learn it was as a result of some damage to the heart, no matter whether caused by drugs, anorexia or other reasons.

Michael’s sunken cheeks and vitiligo (a skin disease resulting in loss of pigmentation) signify a person who is overly-sensitive and likely to deprive themselves of food and/or support, and to withdraw from the world to live in isolation. Interestingly, the cleft he added to his chin is called ‘the mark of the performer’ in Chinese face reading, but can also indicate someone who is reactive emotionally and more likely to suffer feelings of betrayal by those close to him.

It hurts my heart to look at photos of his original, natural face and then what he became. In a nutshell, here is what Chinese face reading would say about someone who looked as he did before and after the surgeries:

Original face: Loving connections with family and friends, stamina and strength, relaxed enjoyment of the pleasures of life, increasing success through life, emphasis on supportive relationships, and a sense of grounded safety in the world.

Changed face: Loss of personal power, extreme vulnerability of the heart emotionally and physically, overly-sensitive, reactive. Aloof, highly stressed, deep issues of lack and deprivation, and need for solitude due to extreme sensitivity. Loss of ‘home’ and ability to feel safe in the world overall.

One last comment that I’d like to offer is the hope that this experience will help our culture move to a place of less judgment and more compassion toward others. The choices Michael Jackson made in his life may well have been due to early childhood trauma and abuse. Though I guess it’s a natural human impulse, it seems shameful that people have been so eager to gossip and judge, rather than feel empathy and kindness toward a brilliant soul in pain.